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Almost two weeks have passed since my rambling New Year’s Resolution post.  After I posted it, I immediately (really and truly, right then) inventoried all of my family’s clothes.  My closet was the first victim of 2012-The Year of Being an ANTI-Consumer.

First, I pulled out a stack of sweaters to give to SueBob.  I hate turtlenecks, and she loves them.  Don’t ask how I keep acquiring them.   Next came a handful of tees that shouldn’t be used as anything but rags.  Then came the pile destined for eBay.  Since I’ve sworn off weekly shopping with Mama, I can sell some things and use the money I make to buy other things as needed.  As I write today, I have a dozen items listed on eBay and another twenty or so to go.  And this is just from my closet!

And then, this really crazy thing has happened.  I feel COMPELLED to purge every closet and every room.  My books are sorted for donating, trading in or sharing with friends.  I have already consigned myriad accessories, lamps and other furniture at a local shop.  And I am ready to start listing some big items on Craigslist.

Sure, it’s refreshing to have only things that you like to wear in your closet.  And it’s nice to get that cobwebby corner of the garage cleaned out.  And my bookshelves look so neat.  But let’s be honest.  Adoption expenses are mounting, and I am quickly approaching a little something I call “flat-ass BROKE”.  Making a little money and saving a little money are good things for me.

When I was younger, my mother always joked about making extra cash.

First your blood.  Then your body.

I feel bad about selling my blood since the Red Cross always needs it for the blood bank so I don’t do it.  And menopause has stolen my abilities and desire to pimp myself out.  Plus, I think “hooking” would push my otherwise patient husband past his limits.

Today, I found a really fun disgusting video about a family who is taking ANTI-Consumerism to new levels.  Levels that border mental illness, perhaps.

For $20 a month?  Really? Isn’t there something else you can cut back to get $20 extra bucks for TOILET PAPER?

I can see me now making this suggestion to Prince Charming.

“Don’t throw away that old tee shirt.  I’m going to cut it into REUSABLE SQUARES OF TOILET PAPER.”

[Hysterical laughter – his, not mine]

“I’m serious.  We need that extra $240 a year.”

“Honey, get your red heels.  I’m taking you down on the corner of Poinsett and Main.  You can make that by the end of the day.”

Apparently I was wrong about whoring being the thing that sent him over the edge.  It’s a wastecan of used asswipes.  Shiver.